Hi Storied family!
Happy Friday and welcome to our second week exploring what our faith after deconstruction looks like. For those of you who have been around awhile, you’re probably tired of us saying this, but it remains true that we don’t claim to be the experts in this or have all the answers. What we ARE trying to do through this newsletter is provide community within which to wrestle with some of our bigger questions, safe in the knowledge that this is a space where we listen, respect and learn from one another.
Welcome!
g + c
Trusting God
By Gabby Llewellyn
I’m not going to lie, this week’s topic, though important, is highly triggering for me to write about. So we will see how this goes.
Last week we focused on taking baby steps towards reestablishing trust with our selves. This week, we’re talking about reestablishing trust with God.
If you’re like me, your whole body just tensed reading that.
I think that’s because in Christian culture, we’ve weaponised “faith in God” so much it has stopped being a comfort or a thing we turn to in trouble, and instead has become the measuring stick by which our entire lives are graded.
For some of us, God and “God’s will” has been the instrument with which we’ve been battered until we’re so bloodied we have to leave faith altogether. For some of us it feels like some cosmic secret we’re the only ones on the outside of, while everyone else seems to have God on speed-dial leaving us to wonder if we just “lack faith.” For some of us, believing in God has been exclusively marketed as our one way ticket out of hell and we’re afraid to admit that we have questions because we don’t want to suffer eternally. For some of us “God" represents an institution we’ve spent our whole lives trying to contort ourselves for, and we’re exhausted, abused by our own efforts and just DONE.
For me personally, it’s some combination of all the above.
For anyone who read Jesus’ words “my burden is easy and my yoke is light,” and wondered how he could possibly be referring to the version of faith you’re experiencing, this issue is for you.